On Life

Well. To begin with I'm doing this blog for Lorraine and Jennifer mostely. Only they read this, right? But they dont have to listen to all the stuff i write all the time. It'll probably be boring. My life is dull now. haha. What can i expect out of life? Right now I'm looking for true friends you could say. And right now I can only say i only have one. But sometimes she makes me feel quesy. If you know what I mean. (You probably don't) I have alot of close friends though, and it makes me happy to have them. They truely brighten my day. :)
Ok. Last night was horrible. It was so scary last night....I watched the part of Grudge 3 you see...and I can't take in horror movies that good. x) Jen and Lorraine, you guys know. So yeah. I was in bed, 2 in the morning, and i hear groaning noises all around me. My heart was lieterally beating out of my chest...but in the midst of it, all I could think of was, "I'm so hungry right now'. And I was. I'm having a problem about food. Like, I'm eating so much. I eat lunch at school, then I come home and I eat like, two bowls of ramen and them I snack on whatever and then I eat dinner. And I'm still hungry dammit. And I'm gaining weight ): but not that much. I need it though. I'm sick of being called anorexic. I told my mom and she wants me to go to the hospital.
I have this sorta crush on this guy, and I think this is the best place to talk about it, I think. I'll call him Pook. So cute like him. x) How many people know? Only three. Jen Lorraine and Smore. mmmhm. Ok. Well. I only tell these people things like this cuz they can keep a secret. Unlike my other good friend. (he's korean. we'll call him 'the woman') can u guess who he is? i bet you can. I don't know. It's at the point when I really do like him, but what can I do? It's so awkward to hang with him, not talk to him. And then when I see him with other girls, I get angry. I like to talk to him in AIM though. Every time we IM, he always starts with, 'I miss you so much right now. I haven't talked to you in forever'. I'm just like, 'awww'.
Jennifer wow. haha, Ok....umm, let's hope your mom won't really confront my mom, cuz my mom will just start bitching all over again. and then she'll probably not want me to hang with you even more. i know this sounds wrong, but i would love to see someone actually yell some sense into her, but i dont want her to get hurt at the same time. she cried one time becuase someone flipped her off when she was driving. It's ok though. don't feel bad. I'm not freaking out over it.
I'm so sad. I used to have a BFF her name was (lets call her 'greenie') can you guess? she's chinese and used to be like my sister. her name sounds like her nickname. but yeah, she really hurt me. Like, seriously, we were SISTERS. she even said one time, 'you're my sister in christ and my sister that i've always wanted'. (she has two older brothers who're twins) and then school comes around sophmore year and the all of a sudden, she's all awkward around me and i introduce her to one of my friends and all of a sudden she bonds with her so well and dosent even talk to me. what the fuc-? I havent told anyone this. actually, ive told the woman. I tell him everything. haha. I dont know. and yeah, my parents are overwhelming sometimes with thier strictness. but they're chinese, what i can i say? :)
haha, i aimed to write as much as jen but i cant. x) and yep. Lorraine! haha, thanks for showing my blogger. I'll try to be like you and write every day if i can...

I'm going to go eat now. bye. :)