wow. i never thought this would happen ever. ive liked Him for a hella long time. but like, i NEVER thought i would get him becuase i thought he was waay out of my league. you know. senior. funny. alot of girls thought He was cute. He'd flirt alot. but yeah.
I'm so happy. i really am. But i can't help feeling that i'm going to lose Him just like that tomorrow. and like, i dont want to be clingy. so im kind of like, should i talk to Him? should i not? ugghh. haha. what a way to start off a relationship. so that's why im not like, 'OMG IM IN LOVE'. sort of thing. im scared that i'm goin to be dumped the next day and that i'm going to look like an idiot.
i want to do stuff for him though. i want to make Him happy. and hopefully, He's like that too.
thank you though. may 22nd '09 <3.>
may 20
listening too: caffe latte by Big Bang
I feel kind of dumb still blogging. i feel like this blog is so empty without the two of you reading about this. :( oh well. i might as well.
things are well...its like. well. its like so happy on the ouside...but the deeper in you get, its so much darker. things are so so good. but so bad. i mean, i feel like im getting closer to everyone, which im glad for. but things for my closest friends are just going downhill. it sucks. i want things to work out and everything will be better and no more of this bullshit will be going around. no more people crying. no more people causing drama. so much drama is happening. with lorraine. with axell. with kirsten. omGOD. ughhh...and i feel like. being in all of it. i want so badly to work everything out without severing frienships. but things like this...its sort of impossible to avoid, you know?
:(
:(
and then. with seabiscuit. its like. ive done alot. ive made alot of moves. but he dosent do anything. maybe he dosent like me. but i know he does. he drops the hints. but he never DOES anything. and its making me sad. cant he see that i like him so much? id do so much for him if he'd only do something for me. :(
I feel kind of dumb still blogging. i feel like this blog is so empty without the two of you reading about this. :( oh well. i might as well.
things are well...its like. well. its like so happy on the ouside...but the deeper in you get, its so much darker. things are so so good. but so bad. i mean, i feel like im getting closer to everyone, which im glad for. but things for my closest friends are just going downhill. it sucks. i want things to work out and everything will be better and no more of this bullshit will be going around. no more people crying. no more people causing drama. so much drama is happening. with lorraine. with axell. with kirsten. omGOD. ughhh...and i feel like. being in all of it. i want so badly to work everything out without severing frienships. but things like this...its sort of impossible to avoid, you know?
:(
:(
and then. with seabiscuit. its like. ive done alot. ive made alot of moves. but he dosent do anything. maybe he dosent like me. but i know he does. he drops the hints. but he never DOES anything. and its making me sad. cant he see that i like him so much? id do so much for him if he'd only do something for me. :(
may 16
listening to: One, Epik High
i sorta feel like writing here will make no difference since no one is here to read it anymore. at least for awhile. i dont know. i feel like our friendships are falling apart string by string. its not a pretty feeling.
on a happier note, the concert last night was AWSOME. i really wasnt expecting much, i mean, they were asians that rapped, and rap dosent even come out that good live. but actually, it was good. i got right next to them! i got to touch one. :) that was my first concert ever and it was so much fun. alot of people i knew where there, actually. haha. and after they ran out of epik high merchandise. :( but i got a far-east movement shirt and got it signed by one of them. me anh diana and anna might have been able to actually meet epik high and like, hug them and stuff, because we were like, the only one's in the building with them. but there was this stupid sercuirty guard. -___- oh well. Tablo is seriously hot. ;)
mmhm. so now im like, super tired. i slept over at anna's house with anh and diana. that was fun. we cleaned anna's refrigerator and table out. haha. between us we ate....two pizzas, a whole pot of rice, three tomatoes, a bowl of filipino bacon, three glasses of tea, and a muffin. yummmm. it was sooo good.
i really had a good day yesterday and today. i will probably never forget it. haha. next up, hollywood bowl. :D
i sorta feel like writing here will make no difference since no one is here to read it anymore. at least for awhile. i dont know. i feel like our friendships are falling apart string by string. its not a pretty feeling.
on a happier note, the concert last night was AWSOME. i really wasnt expecting much, i mean, they were asians that rapped, and rap dosent even come out that good live. but actually, it was good. i got right next to them! i got to touch one. :) that was my first concert ever and it was so much fun. alot of people i knew where there, actually. haha. and after they ran out of epik high merchandise. :( but i got a far-east movement shirt and got it signed by one of them. me anh diana and anna might have been able to actually meet epik high and like, hug them and stuff, because we were like, the only one's in the building with them. but there was this stupid sercuirty guard. -___- oh well. Tablo is seriously hot. ;)
mmhm. so now im like, super tired. i slept over at anna's house with anh and diana. that was fun. we cleaned anna's refrigerator and table out. haha. between us we ate....two pizzas, a whole pot of rice, three tomatoes, a bowl of filipino bacon, three glasses of tea, and a muffin. yummmm. it was sooo good.
i really had a good day yesterday and today. i will probably never forget it. haha. next up, hollywood bowl. :D
may 7
listening to: What (ft. YG FAM, DJ Wreckx) YMGA
hello! i havent been on for awhile becuase my dad banned me from interent for 3 days. anyway. im back on. and yeah...actually. i dont feel like writing really..ill write later. x)
OMG, celia was axed at ANTM! :O
hello! i havent been on for awhile becuase my dad banned me from interent for 3 days. anyway. im back on. and yeah...actually. i dont feel like writing really..ill write later. x)
OMG, celia was axed at ANTM! :O
may 4
Today well, yesterday and today was really fun. sunday was well...just go to st. lawrence catholic high school for a tour of the school for my brother. then, i went home and then i went to lorraine's house for a sleepover. that was ok. we watched alot of tv and then went on the internet and talked and stuff. yeah. regular sleepover.
monday was day off! finally! :D we all went to smash city. that was really fun. seabiscuit came. :D i was happy. but i felt bad becuase i didnt really hang with him even though i invited him. it was becuase greeny was at the same court as him, and i definetly didnt want to be around her...so i had to avoid him. :( but it was ok when we left. he actually tried in mingle with everyone...and cracked a joke and everyone laughed. that made me happy. i hugged him and left. that made my day.
smash city was really fun. i played with everyone. everyone's so good. xD im so out of shape. i dont want to jog. D:
i have to engage seabiscuit in conversation. i feel like i bore him. booo...
yeah. so after smash city seabiscuit went to swim practice, and i went out to eat with everyone else. i want to drive soon. they all look so mature when they drive. yeah. i have to do homework. :( im looking for a profile pic on lorraine's myspace. yeah. im getting it. :) ok. bye.
monday was day off! finally! :D we all went to smash city. that was really fun. seabiscuit came. :D i was happy. but i felt bad becuase i didnt really hang with him even though i invited him. it was becuase greeny was at the same court as him, and i definetly didnt want to be around her...so i had to avoid him. :( but it was ok when we left. he actually tried in mingle with everyone...and cracked a joke and everyone laughed. that made me happy. i hugged him and left. that made my day.
smash city was really fun. i played with everyone. everyone's so good. xD im so out of shape. i dont want to jog. D:
i have to engage seabiscuit in conversation. i feel like i bore him. booo...
yeah. so after smash city seabiscuit went to swim practice, and i went out to eat with everyone else. i want to drive soon. they all look so mature when they drive. yeah. i have to do homework. :( im looking for a profile pic on lorraine's myspace. yeah. im getting it. :) ok. bye.
may 1
listening too: Lollipop By: 2NE1 ft.Big Bang
hope all of you are having fun dancing in the rain at music in the parks. ;) i got to stay home a blog. anyway. today was ok...until the end of the day for various and small reasons. anyway. like i said. the rest of the day was warmth and sunshine. mostely. like any other day. went through the periods like nothing. im scared for our school though. swine flu hit a private school in milpitas, and now rancho is going to close down soon. :( i dont want the flu. i JUST got over a cold. haha. but yeah. i really feel like everyone is overreacting with this swine flu. its just like a flu. no big deal. yeah, it's true you can't cure it, but just like the flu, at some time or other it'll just get out of ur system. and NOONE's died from it in America yet. it's happened in mexico becuase it's so dirty in mexico and there's not sterilization. so no big. dont worry.
jennifer. :( im sorry you heard what you heard during band camp. i feel really bad about that. but i had no friends in band i felt like you left me. well, i had tim and julia. but they had they're own group. which i felt like i didnt belong either. i mean. part of the reason why i joined band again was for you. you just had your friends and i had none. i was being a little lonely brat who couldnt handle being alone for one minute. so yeah. sorry you had to find out about that.
lorraine! congradulations! i know you've been waiting for this day i.e: the countdown. haha.
so the update on seabiscuit:
well, i was trying to tell jennifer, but for some reason i didnt tell her, lol. but yeah. during lunch i was stuck near his table and talking to my friend...hm....nickname...Star. becuase her name reminds me of the solar system. anyway. i was near his table and talking to Star, and then while i was talking to her, i see Seabiscuit with his friend Angel, jen, you've met him, come near me. and Angel's like, 'go talk to her! go! go talk to her!' and i see Seabiscuit being dragged by him. and then, Seabiscuit looks at me, and he's like, 'Um...Hi.' and i just said 'Hi' becuase what else to say? i wanted to say 'why didnt you pick up your phone' because i was trying to call him yesterday, but he ran away too fast. :( uhhuh. idk what to make from that. hm..
oh. i found out he WAS interested in a girl. her name was....ill tell you in person. if you want to know. ask me if you do. but yeah. she's a senior. and she's interested in someone else. and she doesn't like him, i know that for sure becuase another girl on the swim team told me. and idk if he even liked her. the swim girl said, 'he was going for her'. so yeah...but. idk about what happened today. :(
i want a hair cut! im thinking of cutting my hair into a boy's cut soon. kapeesh?
ok. im happy jen blogged again. and about the drama...yeah. i want it to be over soon. but as long as we stay neutral about this, thing's will be ok. bye!
hope all of you are having fun dancing in the rain at music in the parks. ;) i got to stay home a blog. anyway. today was ok...until the end of the day for various and small reasons. anyway. like i said. the rest of the day was warmth and sunshine. mostely. like any other day. went through the periods like nothing. im scared for our school though. swine flu hit a private school in milpitas, and now rancho is going to close down soon. :( i dont want the flu. i JUST got over a cold. haha. but yeah. i really feel like everyone is overreacting with this swine flu. its just like a flu. no big deal. yeah, it's true you can't cure it, but just like the flu, at some time or other it'll just get out of ur system. and NOONE's died from it in America yet. it's happened in mexico becuase it's so dirty in mexico and there's not sterilization. so no big. dont worry.
jennifer. :( im sorry you heard what you heard during band camp. i feel really bad about that. but i had no friends in band i felt like you left me. well, i had tim and julia. but they had they're own group. which i felt like i didnt belong either. i mean. part of the reason why i joined band again was for you. you just had your friends and i had none. i was being a little lonely brat who couldnt handle being alone for one minute. so yeah. sorry you had to find out about that.
lorraine! congradulations! i know you've been waiting for this day i.e: the countdown. haha.
so the update on seabiscuit:
well, i was trying to tell jennifer, but for some reason i didnt tell her, lol. but yeah. during lunch i was stuck near his table and talking to my friend...hm....nickname...Star. becuase her name reminds me of the solar system. anyway. i was near his table and talking to Star, and then while i was talking to her, i see Seabiscuit with his friend Angel, jen, you've met him, come near me. and Angel's like, 'go talk to her! go! go talk to her!' and i see Seabiscuit being dragged by him. and then, Seabiscuit looks at me, and he's like, 'Um...Hi.' and i just said 'Hi' becuase what else to say? i wanted to say 'why didnt you pick up your phone' because i was trying to call him yesterday, but he ran away too fast. :( uhhuh. idk what to make from that. hm..
oh. i found out he WAS interested in a girl. her name was....ill tell you in person. if you want to know. ask me if you do. but yeah. she's a senior. and she's interested in someone else. and she doesn't like him, i know that for sure becuase another girl on the swim team told me. and idk if he even liked her. the swim girl said, 'he was going for her'. so yeah...but. idk about what happened today. :(
i want a hair cut! im thinking of cutting my hair into a boy's cut soon. kapeesh?
ok. im happy jen blogged again. and about the drama...yeah. i want it to be over soon. but as long as we stay neutral about this, thing's will be ok. bye!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
