08.10.09

watching: teen choice awards


if i'm not apart of you guys, then why do you say i am and then when we all go home and shut the doors, everything becomes distant? there are only two people in the world that i can trust that this will never happen to me. those people are true friends no matter who the person. and i appreciate taht and will treasure them with all my heart forever. i feel like my friends are dwinling one by one. and i admit, im guilty for being just like them. distant over phone, two faced in person. and i hate it. but what can you do when everyone else is like that to you?
do you know who you are? am i REALLY your friend? hmmmm...
i mean. i wonder. where does my trust lie...?

dealarik, you do what you need to do. i want you to be happy and i wish that with all my heart. ill be sad to see you gone. but when you come back, i hope you thought things through and you are clear and happy. you of all people i respect and trust and are one of my closest friends. you, and people like that dont deserve to go through such cruel situations. it's noone fault. it happens. and you do what you need to do to straighten it out and make yourself happy. if you change, at least YOU'RE happy. i dont want to lose this relationship with you though. i hope we'll still be able to still lean on each other as much as we do now in the future.
im going to miss you. miss you so much. but like you said, ill be here like you'll be here, and ill tell you what i think. ill follow through on my word. so dont worry about me. ok? :) let's aim to be happy!